v2c5: Dying on the Beach
On the first day back at school, Lu Li noticed something was off about Chu Jingyi. While Silly Goose was usually quite quirky, today she was acting even stranger than usual. Ever since he had entered the classroom, she had been sneaking glances at him, clearly wanting to say something, but whenever he turned to look at her, she would quickly avert her gaze and pretend to be admiring the scenery.
Had he become more handsome? Lu Li touched his cheek, feeling a surge of narcissism. He hadn’t expected another growth spurt at sixteen. How remarkable.
Just then, a wave of murmurs rippled through the classroom. Lu Li looked up, his expression freezing. Fine, Chu Jingyi being strange was one thing, but what was going on with An Baili? Today, she had taken off her thick-rimmed glasses, her braids were undone, and her long, black hair cascaded down her back. Her features were delicate, her smile captivating. She looked like a beautiful girl straight out of a painting. Honestly, in terms of appearance alone, An Baili definitely ranked first in his heart.
If West Lake was compared to Xi Shi, she would be beautiful with both heavy and light makeup.
An Baili twirled in front of his desk, her skirt swirling around her. “Li, do I look pretty today?”
Very pretty. The boys in the class were practically drooling. Seeing her approach Lu Li so openly, they pounded their chests in frustration, regretting their ignorance for overlooking such a stunning girl.
Lu Li remained silent, pretending not to notice. Complimenting a woman’s appearance was a rather intimate act, especially coming from a man. From a male perspective, “pretty” often equated to sexual attractiveness. In both his lives, he had only genuinely complimented two women: An Baili and Sister Yameng.
If An Baili was like Xi Shi, beautiful with both heavy and light makeup, then Sister Yameng was like Mulan, valiant and heroic. As for Chu Jingyi, with her silly personality, she was probably like a simple foot soldier, charging headfirst into battle.
A warm sensation brushed against his cheek. Lu Li flinched, taking a step back. An Baili had kissed him while he was lost in thought! He stared at her, trying to figure out what had gotten into her today. She simply smiled brightly, tiptoeing back to her seat. Chu Jingyi, sitting beside her, gaped, her mouth wide enough to fit a melon.
A thousand questions swirled in her mind, but Chu Jingyi managed to hold them back. She could tell that An Baili was waiting for her to ask, a smug smile on her face.
“They’re all liars… deceiving me,” Chu Jingyi muttered.
She trusted Lu Li and Baili so much, but why did they keep things from her? Her eyes fixated on the faint, moist mark on Lu Li’s cheek, her heart aching. She pulled out a tissue and handed it to him. “Wipe your face.”
Lu Li took the tissue, momentarily confused before understanding her meaning.
“Jingyi, do you have something to tell me?” he asked, taking the initiative.
“…Yes.” She hesitated. “You didn’t join any clubs last year, right? Would you like to join our High School Volunteer Club?”
The student volunteer club? Perhaps their intentions were good, but under the influence of the system, they had lost their original meaning. Expecting self-discipline to improve morality was unrealistic. The most direct and effective motivator for doing good deeds was material wealth. The student volunteer club at Chuanhai No. 1 High School was just a playground for rich kids. Of course, he wasn’t including Chu Jingyi in that assessment.
“I’m planning to start my own club.”
“Start your own club? But you’ll be a senior next year. You’ll have to quit.”
“I know.” Lu Li was honest. “I’m going to start a game development club. I’ll put down our computer teacher as the advisor and forge his signature.”
“Are you sure you don’t want to join the High School Volunteer Club? I’m the president, you know~” Chu Jingyi tried to tempt him.
“I’m planning to recruit you as a founding member of my game development club. What do you say, class monitor? Are you interested?”
Chu Jingyi was actually tempted. Starting a club from scratch with Lu Li? It sounded… a tiny bit, a teeny bit, a smidgen interesting. She opened and closed her mouth, unable to form a coherent sentence.
“I want to join too!” An Baili suddenly interjected.
“I didn’t invite you.”
“I’m requesting to join! If you don’t agree, I’ll cry! Class is about to start, and everyone is here. If I cry, everyone will notice us, right?” An Baili puffed out her chest.
Once you gave in to a threat, there would be a second, a third. The best way to deal with threats was to eliminate the source.
“If you cry too quietly, I’ll be disappointed.” Lu Li scoffed.
He was someone who responded to softness, not force. If An Baili had asked nicely, he might have agreed. But before the emperor could speak, the eunuch had jumped in. Silly Goose quickly grabbed An Baili’s hand. “Hey, Baili, don’t! Lu Li, just agree. It’s not a big deal. If you agree, I’ll join your club too!”
So she wasn’t threatening him; she was threatening Chu Jingyi. Lu Li looked at An Baili, realizing she had become much smarter. From the moment she entered the classroom, she had been trying to gain the upper hand. He, on the other hand, had been slow to catch on. He glared at An Baili.
“Since Jingyi insists, fine.”
After morning reading, Lu Li walked straight up to An Baili, grabbed her wrist, and pulled her outside. “I need to talk to you.”
He dragged her to the rooftop, pushing her against the wall. An Baili smiled seductively. “What’s wrong? Am I too pretty for you to resist? Be careful not to finish inside. It’ll be messy to clean up during class.”
“I thought I made myself clear last time.” His expression remained unchanged.
“Li, I know your personality, your hobbies, your weaknesses, everything. I know who you truly are. But do you even know me?” An Baili asked a question that should have been absurd, making him pause. Who was An Baili? Before his rebirth, he could have easily answered that question. Now, however, he couldn’t understand her anymore.
“I exist only for you.” Words that should have been a vow of eternal love sent shivers down his spine coming from her.
“No matter what, I won’t give up on you. Unless you kill me. Push me off this roof, and An Baili will be gone. No one will bother you anymore.” Her voice trembled as she spoke. Clearly, she wasn’t a heartless witch after all.
Couples who were madly in love rarely lasted. Love fueled by passion would die on the beach when the tide receded. Lu Li had believed that his relationship with An Baili was like that, but now it seemed she thought differently. Their views had been fundamentally different from the start.
“An Baili, I hate you now. Do you know why?”
Her pupils flickered, waiting for him to continue.
“Everyone in this world has their own identity, their own place. There are things they can and cannot do. So I ask you, what is the one thing a person should never do? Let me give you a hint: What are the most serious crimes in our penal code?”
An Baili slumped against the wall, defeated. “So… that’s it…”
Seeing her finally understand, Lu Li scoffed. “That’s it? How twisted are your morals? Did I have to spell it out for you?”
In their relationship, he was the one who had wronged her, the one who had broken his promise. He had felt guilty and remorseful when he asked for a divorce. But outside the context of their relationship, what An Baili had done was unforgivable. Being with her was like holding a time bomb, never knowing when it might explode and obliterate him.
Yandere characters were best left in fiction.
“Li, I can give you a reason to forgive me.”
“There’s no excuse for what you did.”
She clung to his arm, pleading. “Just this once. You’ll understand when you see ‘that thing.’”
“Haven’t you had enough?!” He had lost all patience. “Just this once,” she had said, over and over again. There would always be a next time, always more entanglement.
He shook off her hand and left the rooftop. As he pushed open the door to the stairwell, he paused. He had closed the door when he came up. Why was it ajar now? Without thinking too much about it, he hurried downstairs. Halfway down, he sighed and quietly turned back. He was worried that An Baili might do something reckless. She was capable of anything.
An Baili was still leaning against the wall, her only movement the soft sound of her sobs.
He couldn’t remember how many times he had hurt her since his rebirth. No matter how cold and heartless he pretended to be, he was still human. They had been husband and wife for a lifetime. How could he not have any feelings for her? He wouldn’t even be able to abandon a dog he had raised for so long, let alone a woman who had been devoted to him.
He crouched in the stairwell, separated from her by a single wall, their backs to each other. He listened silently to her cries. A husband who made his wife cry was a scumbag. Lu Li felt like a scumbag. No matter how noble his excuses were, he was the one who had abandoned her first.
What had gone wrong? He sat in the darkness, silent as a statue, his thoughts drifting back to familiar yet distant memories…
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