Chapter 96: Contact
You Ruxu stared blankly at the message, unsure whether her hand hurt, her heart hurt, or if she was simply numb. She felt nothing, just a dull ache, an urge to message Zhou Tianzui again.
She resisted.
A nurse peeked in from the corridor, “Reporter You, you have a checkup soon, is there anyone with you?”
You Ruxu said, “No, I can go by myself.”
The nurse, looking at her pale face and her injured leg, felt a pang of sympathy, “I’ll wheel you over later then.”
You Ruxu said, “Okay, thank you.”
After the nurse left, You Ruxu looked down at her phone, the screen still displaying Zhou Tianzui’s message.
Zhou Tianzui.
Was she abandoning her?
You Ruxu pursed her lips, her fingers unconsciously tracing the screen, her eyes suddenly burning, her vision blurring. She slowly lay down, her hand gripping the edge of the blanket, her teeth sinking into the fabric.
She had a checkup soon.
She couldn’t cry.
She couldn’t.
You Ruxu, you weren’t a child anymore, there was nothing to cry about.
Her shoulders trembled slightly, her teeth digging into the blanket, the fabric bunching up in her mouth. You Ruxu suppressed her sobs, remaining motionless, until the nurse knocked and entered.
She saw the redness in You Ruxu’s eyes.
The nurse asked with concern, “Reporter You, are you feeling unwell?”
You Ruxu said, “My hand hurts, do you have any more painkillers?”
“Yes.” The nurse said, “Should we wait until after your checkup?”
You Ruxu wanted to say yes, but the pain was too much, making it difficult to speak. She opened her mouth, her voice barely a whisper, “Okay, thank you.”
The nurse felt a strange pang of sadness, hearing her voice, an unexpected emotion. She quickly said, “I’ll take you over then.”
She wheeled You Ruxu to the examination room. While the doctor examined her, the nurse stood outside, talking to the head nurse, “Don’t you think Reporter You is different?”
The head nurse, looking at her computer, casually replied, “Different how?”
“She just seems different.” The nurse said, “She seems so fragile now, like she needs protecting.”
The head nurse’s lips twitched, “Are you becoming like He Wei now?”
He Wei’s admiration for You Ruxu was well-known throughout the inpatient department. They often teased her about it. The nurse said, “I just noticed, Reporter You wasn’t like this before.”
The head nurse, without looking up, said, “Reporter You is truly charismatic.”
The nurse nodded, “Yes, yes, you’re right.”
The head nurse chuckled. It was just a casual remark, and the nurse took it seriously. She smiled and looked towards the examination room. You Ruxu was undergoing the checkup, sitting in the wheelchair, her profile delicate, her long hair cascading down her back, her bangs framing her face, her eyes clear, her skin pale.
A fragile beauty.
She admired it inwardly.
The checkup was soon over. The nurse wheeled her back to the ward. Captain Zhou arrived again, with updates on the case. They had a lead on the informant, one person in particular.
You Ruxu said, “Chen Jiushu? From the record company?”
Captain Zhou said, “He appeared in several of Xu Jinwan’s news stories before they were published.”
But they couldn’t find him.
You Ruxu suddenly remembered the call from the 4S shop earlier, also saying they hadn’t been able to reach Chen Jiushu for the past few days. She asked, “Do you think he’s on the run?”
“That’s a possibility.” Either he got wind of the investigation and ran, or he was spooked by You Ruxu’s incident yesterday, Captain Zhou said, “Either way, you should be careful.”
You Ruxu nodded.
After discussing the case, Captain Zhou looked at her, “What happened to your eyes? They’re so red.”
You Ruxu touched her eyelids, they felt a little sore, “It’s nothing.”
Captain Zhou looked around the room.
She asked, “Dr. Zhou isn’t here?”
You Ruxu’s throat tightened. After a pause, she said, “She’s still working.”
Just then, there was a knock on the door. The nurse said, “Reporter You, I brought your painkillers.”
Captain Zhou looked down, “Is your hand hurting? Or somewhere else?”
The nurse said, “Reporter You said her hand hurts.”
Captain Zhou looked at You Ruxu.
You Ruxu said, “Give them to me, thank you.”
Captain Zhou poured her a glass of warm water, handed it to her, and said, “No one’s here with you tonight, I…”
“I don’t need anyone here.” You Ruxu said to Captain Zhou, “I can ask the nurses for help if I need anything.”
She smiled, but her demeanor was distant. Captain Zhou said, “Okay, call me if you need anything.”
You Ruxu nodded, “Okay.”
After Captain Zhou left, the ward was quiet, so quiet that You Ruxu could hear her own heartbeat.
“Being a reporter is so important, then what about me?”
“If you had to choose one?”
You Ruxu couldn’t turn over easily, so she just lay there, looking at the ceiling and the fluorescent light above. After a moment of thought, she took her phone and messaged Zhou Tianzui, wanting to call her, wanting to hear her voice, but the cold words on the screen felt like a knife twisting in her heart, a fresh wound. Calling now would be disturbing her, wouldn’t it? Although Zhou Tianzui could be sharp-tongued, and sometimes say hurtful things, she had never told her not to contact her.
She knew Zhou Tianzui’s personality.
She meant what she said.
If she said not to contact her.
She truly meant it.
You Ruxu gripped her phone, bit her lip, and scrolled through her chat history with Zhou Tianzui. Most of her messages were voice messages, because she was busy with work, no time to type. She would grab her phone, quickly say a few words, and then wait for Zhou Tianzui’s reply.
The intervals between their messages varied, sometimes a reply would come hours later.
Zhou Tianzui would tease her, “Did you take a trip around the world before replying?”
Back then, she found Zhou Tianzui’s teasing annoying, but now, she missed it. You Ruxu scrolled up, just a few months, yet they had talked more than in the past two or three years.
She saved the voice messages, one by one, then played them, listening to Zhou Tianzui’s voice in her ear.
“A Ran…”
“Teacher You…”
Her hand hurt, her leg hurt, her entire body ached, screaming in protest, her mind in turmoil. The pain made it difficult to breathe. Her vision, which had just cleared, blurred again. You Ruxu pulled the blanket over her head.
Hiding in the darkness.
She couldn’t help it and called Yu Qiao.
Perhaps, from Yu Qiao, she could hear something about Zhou Tianzui, even just a few words would be enough.
The call went through.
But the line was busy.
You Ruxu, in a moment of desperation, tried again and again, but the cold, automated voice kept repeating, the number you dialed is busy, severing her last hope.
It was as if everything she had been clinging to suddenly crumbled.
She put down her phone and bit down hard on the back of her hand, trying not to make a sound. She drew blood, the metallic taste making her nauseous. She pushed aside the blanket and reached for a tissue, but her hand couldn’t reach, her leg hurt too much to move, the blood trickling down her arm, a stark red against her pale skin.
You Ruxu tried twice, struggling to reach the tissue box on the bedside table, that small distance an insurmountable chasm, defeated and helpless.
The tissue box so close, Zhou Tianzui so close.
Yet she couldn’t reach either.
Zhou Tianzui sat on the sofa. Yu Qiao was making dinner. Since Zhou Tianzui poured her a glass of water earlier, Yu Qiao hadn’t spoken a word to her, ignoring her completely, as if she didn’t exist.
Afraid Yu Qiao might have a relapse, she had stayed here all afternoon, not daring to leave. Yu Qiao seemed fine, preparing dinner at the usual time, just not speaking to Zhou Tianzui.
She walked past Zhou Tianzui, cleaning the apartment, washing clothes, preparing the vegetables. Zhou Tianzui couldn’t help but call out, “Mom.”
Yu Qiao’s face was grim as she continued washing the vegetables, ignoring her.
Zhou Tianzui took the vegetables from her hand, “Mom, look at me.”
Yu Qiao took the vegetables back, not even glancing at her, refusing to communicate, refusing to speak. Zhou Tianzui sighed and went to the living room, picked up the car keys. Yu Qiao asked, her voice low and accusatory, “Where are you going?”
Zhou Tianzui said, “Just going for a drive.”
“Dinner will be ready soon.” Yu Qiao said, “Don’t go.”
Zhou Tianzui, hearing her speak, put down the keys, “Mom, let’s talk, okay?”
“If you’re trying to convince me, give up.” Yu Qiao said, “I won’t agree.”
Zhou Tianzui said, “Mom, why won’t you agree?”
“Why won’t I agree?” Yu Qiao threw the vegetables into the sink, the water splashing. She said, “Zhou Tianzui, do you even know what you’re doing? You’re letting everyone know you’re gay, have you considered the consequences?”
Zhou Tianzui said indifferently, “So what if I have?”
“So what?!” Yu Qiao’s voice rose, sharp and shrill, “We finally escaped those rumors and gossip, I won’t let you go through that again!” Her tone was firm and resolute. “So I absolutely will not agree to you two being together!”
Zhou Tianzui said, “Mom, we don’t care about those rumors…”
“Don’t care?” Yu Qiao said, “Is it you who don’t care, or her? You’re only thirty, how long can you not care? How many years can you endure it? What if you can’t?”
As if picturing that scenario.
Yu Qiao’s face paled. She remembered when she first found out about Zhou Qiming’s accident, how she had tried to argue, to explain to everyone, how those accusations piled up against him, against her, until she had no more strength to fight, she thought she didn’t care anymore, what the truth was, she didn’t care, she just wanted to live a good life with Zhou Tianzui.
But every time she closed her eyes, those accusations, those insults, they would haunt her, pointing fingers, whispering behind her back, waking her up in the middle of the night, those nightmares, a living hell.
She would never let Zhou Tianzui go through that again!
Zhou Tianzui, seeing her pale face, called out, “Mom.”
Yu Qiao said, “If you still consider me your mother, break up with her, if you can’t bring yourself to do it, I’ll do it for you.”
Zhou Tianzui frowned, her voice rising slightly, “Mom, I won’t break up with her, no matter the consequences, I can accept them.”
“Accept what?” Yu Qiao said, “Do you know what it’s like to live in hell? Can you endure that kind of life?”
“I can.” Zhou Tianzui looked at Yu Qiao, guilt in her eyes. She clenched her hands, then released them, suppressing the words on the tip of her tongue, “Every single day I lied to you.”
“I was living in hell.”
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