Chapter 48: Not The Same
Wu Xiulian patted You Ruxu’s back: “Why are you drinking so fast? Slow down.” She looked at Zhou Tianzui, “I’m not a doctor, so I’ll have to trouble Dr. Zhou to take care of you tonight. What are you thinking about?”
You Ruxu glanced at Zhou Tianzui and put down the empty bowl, “Nothing.”
Wu Xiulian said, “Go to bed early after you finish. Dr. Zhou, I’ll be next door, call me if you need anything.”
Zhou Tianzui nodded.
She watched Wu Xiulian leave, thought for a moment, then also got up and went out. Wu Xiulian was washing dishes in the kitchen. Hearing the noise, she turned around, saw Zhou Tianzui, and asked, “What’s wrong?”
Zhou Tianzui said, “Thank you.”
Wu Xiulian’s hands paused mid-wash. She looked at Zhou Tianzui intently and said, “You don’t have to thank me.” She lowered her head, “Go keep Xu Xu company.”
Zhou Tianzui stood there for a few seconds, then turned and went back to the bedroom.
After she left, Wu Xiulian leaned against the edge of the sink, her head lowered, thinking about what she had said to Zhou Tianzui, her hands gripping the edge tightly, the veins on her wrists bulging, a silent, desperate struggle.
Finally, she straightened up and continued washing the dishes.
After finishing, she went to the bathroom to change. There was no sound from the bedroom. She went into the study next door and sat at the desk for a long time, then took a file folder from a locked cabinet.
There weren’t many things inside the folder, just a few sheets of paper and a notebook. The notebook looked familiar, the kind every news outlet gave to their reporters for taking notes and reporting.
This notebook was quite old, worn, even the cover was torn, the pages yellowed, but the content was still clearly legible, very well preserved. She opened the notebook, flipped through the pages one by one, then suddenly closed it, placing it aside.
In the quiet study, a click.
A cigarette lighter ignited, a scarlet flame and a wisp of white smoke. Wu Xiulian looked at the two handwritten pages beneath the notebook, the handwriting elegant, with a touch of youthful naivety. She looked at them repeatedly, having already read them countless times, every word etched in her memory, yet afraid to look too closely.
After finishing the cigarette, Wu Xiulian put out the butt in the ashtray, casually placed the handwritten pages and the notebook back into the folder. A line of small characters was written on the cover of the folder, with a signature at the bottom.
—You Ruxu.
Her finger traced You Ruxu’s name, then looked towards the bedroom, finally locking the folder back in the cabinet, turning to go to bed.
During the night, Wu Xiulian was startled awake.
You Ruxu had a high fever that wouldn’t break, even after taking medication. Zhou Tianzui was about to take her to the hospital. While she was getting ready in the living room, Wu Xiulian woke up, put on some clothes, and helped, changing You Ruxu’s clothes, getting her bag and the car keys. Wu Xiulian drove, taking them directly to the city hospital.
Zhou Tianzui, looking at You Ruxu’s flushed face, frowned deeply.
You Ruxu was taken for tests. There weren’t many people in the emergency room at night. You Ruxu was clearly delirious, taking a few seconds to respond to questions. Zhou Tianzui bustled around for over half an hour, finally getting her an IV drip. Wu Xiulian sat beside You Ruxu, hearing her cough several times, and said, “I’ll get you some water.”
She poured half a glass of water and handed it to You Ruxu, who took a sip, her dry lips regaining some color. Wu Xiulian said, “You, after all these years, your health is still the same.”
You Ruxu said, “I used to be very healthy.”
“You were, indeed.” Wu Xiulian chuckled, exasperated, “But who was it who had a high fever in the middle of the night, crying for their mother?”
It was when You Ruxu was in her second year of high school. She had gone out with her classmates for two days and came back with a fever, a low-grade fever at first, then a high fever. She took medicine, recovered, and then the fever returned the next day, on and off for four or five days. Finally, Wu Xiulian took her to the hospital, also at night. You Ruxu, delirious, clung to the nurse, crying for her mother.
Only when Wu Xiulian held her did she calm down.
You Ruxu said, “I don’t remember.”
“Oh, you don’t remember?” Wu Xiulian chuckled, “Then you don’t remember your aunt staying with you half the night either?”
Zhou Tianzui, after paying the fees, returned to the IV drip area and saw You Ruxu talking to Wu Xiulian, her head lowered, her fever seemingly subsided, her face pale, her bangs framing her face. She looked very quiet, a quietness that Zhou Tianzui found endearing.
Endearing?
It suited You Ruxu.
A warmth spread through her heart. She heard Wu Xiulian look up and call, “Dr. Zhou.”
Zhou Tianzui walked over and asked You Ruxu, “How are you feeling? Any better?”
You Ruxu said, “Much better.”
But her voice was still hoarse, lacking its usual clarity, a low and slightly husky tone, very different from her usual voice. She didn’t say much, just pursed her lips after speaking. Wu Xiulian said, “I’m going to rest for a bit, you two talk.”
Giving them some space.
You Ruxu looked at Zhou Tianzui. She had fallen asleep before Zhou Tianzui returned to the bedroom the second time. Presumably because of the high fever, she wanted to open her eyes and look at Zhou Tianzui, but couldn’t, unable to even lift her eyelids.
Zhou Tianzui sat on the chair beside her. You Ruxu’s right hand was hooked up to the IV drip, the needle inserted into the back of her hand. Her hand and wrist were cold. Zhou Tianzui took a small hand warmer from her pocket. You Ruxu asked curiously, “Where did you get that?”
“Borrowed it from the nurses.” Zhou Tianzui said, “They usually have these in the pediatric ward.”
They were used for children receiving IV drips, to help with blood circulation. Zhou Tianzui had just gone to borrow one. You Ruxu smiled faintly, watching as Zhou Tianzui placed it in her hand, the warmth spreading from Zhou Tianzui’s hand to hers.
Zhou Tianzui asked, “Still cold?”
You Ruxu shook her head.
Zhou Tianzui asked, “Why aren’t you talking?”
“My voice sounds awful.” You Ruxu pursed her lips after speaking. Zhou Tianzui said, “It sounds nice.”
You Ruxu looked at her. Zhou Tianzui said, “Really.”
Clearly, it wasn’t convincing.
You Ruxu didn’t believe her.
Zhou Tianzui said, “It sounds very gentle.”
You Ruxu chuckled, “Aren’t you usually good with compliments?”
Zhou Tianzui said, “Not good enough? Then let me try again.”
You Ruxu said, “No need.”
Their voices were soft and gentle. Wu Xiulian, pretending to nap, looked at them, her heart softening. She sighed softly and reached for her phone, wanting to message Wu Xiulian’s mother, but then thought, Wu Xiulian’s mother probably didn’t want to hear from her right now.
It was almost six o’clock by the time You Ruxu’s IV drip was finished. Wu Xiulian, having taken leave from work, took You Ruxu and Zhou Tianzui to a nearby breakfast shop for steamed buns. You Ruxu, having just recovered from a high fever, only had a bowl of plain porridge. Wu Xiulian, sitting opposite them, said, “Xu Xu loved the steamed buns here when she was young, she could eat a whole steamer by herself.”
You Ruxu’s voice was even hoarser now. She protested, “No, I didn’t.”
“Yes, you did.” Wu Xiulian chuckled, “When she was young, she didn’t talk much, wouldn’t say whether she liked something or not. But she would always eat more of the things she liked. I noticed this and often brought her here for breakfast. Every time, she would say sweetly, ‘Auntie is so nice.’”
She sighed, “Now Auntie is not nice anymore, is she?”
You Ruxu looked down, ignoring her.
After a while, she said, “Do you want some steamed buns?”
Zhou Tianzui said, “Let’s have a steamer.”
A steamer of eight small buns arrived, thin-skinned and filled with juicy meat. Zhou Tianzui scooped one up with a spoon and offered it to You Ruxu. Wu Xiulian said, “Xu Xu just had a fever…”
“It’s okay.” Zhou Tianzui said, “One bun won’t hurt.”
You Ruxu smiled faintly, took the spoon, and took a bite. It was the familiar taste.
Halfway through their meal, Zhou Tianzui received a call from Han Shuang, about the interview. Zhou Tianzui then remembered she had changed the time. She finalized the location with Han Shuang and hung up. Wu Xiulian asked, “Dr. Zhou, do you have something to do?”
You Ruxu said, “You go ahead, I’ll go back with my aunt after I finish eating.”
Zhou Tianzui said, “I’ll drive you back.”
Wu Xiulian didn’t refuse.
You Ruxu lowered her head and continued eating her porridge.
After breakfast, Zhou Tianzui drove them back. She had to go back to the summit after her interview, probably not finishing until six or seven in the evening. She didn’t know if she would be able to see You Ruxu again, worried You Ruxu might be resting. Zhou Tianzui said, “Go to sleep first, I’ll call you when I’m done.”
You Ruxu nodded.
She slept in the bedroom, Wu Xiulian in the study, as if deliberately avoiding each other. Wu Xiulian went into the study as soon as they arrived and hadn’t come out since. Zhou Tianzui made You Ruxu lie down, tucked her in, and said, “I’ll be going now.”
The blanket covered You Ruxu’s shoulders. She was sleeping on her side, half of her face visible, fair and pale. Hearing Zhou Tianzui’s words, she looked over, her lips parting slightly, when Zhou Tianzui cupped her face in her hands and leaned down, kissing her gently on the lips.
A soft, fleeting touch.
Zhou Tianzui’s scent lingered. You Ruxu unconsciously bit her lip, her teeth grazing her skin, her lips regaining some color. She said, “I have a cold…”
Zhou Tianzui lowered her head, her hands still cupping You Ruxu’s face, her voice low, “I told you, give it to me.”
She kissed You Ruxu again.
Unlike the previous fleeting touch, this time, Zhou Tianzui bit You Ruxu’s lip gently. The minty freshness of their recently brushed teeth mingled, a refreshing scent blending into an intoxicating fragrance.
Addictive.
Zhou Tianzui repeatedly traced her lips, stealing her breath, a fierce and passionate kiss.
You Ruxu’s breathing was unsteady. She placed her hands on Zhou Tianzui’s shoulders, wanting to push her away, worried her aunt might come in, but her hands moved instead to Zhou Tianzui’s neck, pulling her closer.
Her face flushed crimson.
Zhou Tianzui released her, her finger brushing You Ruxu’s lips. She said, “I’ll be going now.”
You Ruxu’s eyes were bright, her lips slightly swollen. She nodded. As Zhou Tianzui turned to leave, she called out, “Zhou Tianzui.”
Zhou Tianzui turned around.
You Ruxu said, “I didn’t like cilantro before, and I didn’t like scallions.”
Zhou Tianzui stood there quietly.
You Ruxu said, “But you’re not the same.”
Zhou Tianzui asked, “Not the same as what?”
You Ruxu said, “You’re not cilantro, and you’re not scallions.”
A sweetness spread through Zhou Tianzui’s heart. She asked, “Then what am I?”
She seemed to be waiting for You Ruxu to say something, even just a few words, a sweet nothing, but You Ruxu just looked at her for a few seconds and said, “You’re Zhou Tianzui.”
Zhou Tianzui sighed, paused for two seconds, and said, “You should go back to sleep.”
You Ruxu said, “Oh.”
Just “oh.”
Zhou Tianzui didn’t know whether to laugh or cry.
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