Chapter 46: Stubborn
Zhou Tianzui sat in a chair, the room reeking of alcohol. She didn’t like the smell and never drank before. Tonight, on a whim, she had a little, and as expected, it wasn’t pleasant.
She looked towards the doorway, remembering You Ruxu’s parting words: Pathetic?
It was like a hammer blow to her chest, a dull ache. She sat quietly for a long time, listening to the rain outside, then stood up and gathered the empty bottles and cans on the coffee table, tossing them into a trash bag. After tidying up the living room, she looked at the kitchen, walked over, and sat down at the table. The scallion and egg drop soup, which You Ruxu had only taken a sip of, had gone cold. The green scallions, soaked in the soup, had turned a dark, murky green. Zhou Tianzui absently stirred the soup with a spoon, then took a sip, the coldness spreading through her.
It was truly unpleasant.
Was this how You Ruxu felt when she ate this?
She could have easily said she didn’t like it and asked for something else, just like how she had hinted at her plans to return to Yuhai, instead of telling Zhou Tianzui directly.
She had never stopped You Ruxu from doing what she wanted, she just, wished You Ruxu would talk to her.
But You Ruxu was a clam.
And she didn’t know how such a clam could be a reporter. Zhou Tianzui thought she must be drunk, her mind wandering, thinking about You Ruxu, remembering the first time they met, You Ruxu standing outside the car window, smiling at her, softly calling out, “Dr. Zhou.”
She remembered the many times You Ruxu waited for her in the car after work, so engrossed in her work that she would lose track of time, and realizing how long she had waited, would look at her apologetically, asking what she could do to make it up to her.
Guilt, compensation.
Zhou Tianzui didn’t want anything to do with such words, but she knew, deep down, that if it weren’t for guilt, You Ruxu wouldn’t tolerate her temper.
She felt like someone who wanted to have her cake and eat it too.
It wasn’t You Ruxu who was pathetic.
It was her.
She was the one who mistook guilt for love, foolishly thinking she could have a normal relationship.
Zhou Tianzui’s mind was in a mess, but she continued to drink the cold soup, the chill seeping into her bones. Just as she put down the bowl, her phone rang. It was an unknown number.
An unknown number at two in the morning, Zhou Tianzui didn’t intend to answer.
But the caller was persistent. Zhou Tianzui pursed her lips and answered the call, a familiar voice coming through, “Ruxu, is Ruxu with you?”
It was Wu Xiulian.
Zhou Tianzui paused and said, “No, she’s not, what’s wrong?”
She abruptly stood up, hearing the tremor in Wu Xiulian’s voice, “I don’t know where she went, she didn’t come to you…?”
Zhou Tianzui said, “No.”
You Ruxu had left just a few hours ago. She asked, “Did she go home?”
Wu Xiulian said, “She was home earlier tonight.”
She had been home earlier, but when Wu Xiulian went to the bathroom just now, passing by You Ruxu’s room, she remembered that the window was still half-open in the afternoon and, worried You Ruxu might be cold, went to close it. She knocked, but there was no answer, so she quietly opened the door. The bed was empty.
You Ruxu wasn’t home.
She wasn’t the type to wander off. Even if she went out, she would tell her or her father, never disappearing suddenly. So, Wu Xiulian was worried and immediately called You Ruxu, but the call went unanswered. Panicked, she called Zhou Tianzui.
Zhou Tianzui said, “I’ll come over and take a look.”
Wu Xiulian said, “No—”
She instinctively wanted to refuse, then thought, could it be because she threw away You Ruxu’s teddy bear? She paused and said, “Are you still awake?”
Zhou Tianzui said, “Yes.”
Wu Xiulian said, “If it’s not too much trouble, could you please check around the hotel? If she comes to you, please contact us immediately, okay?”
Zhou Tianzui agreed, grabbed her jacket, and rushed downstairs. It was cold outside, the rain even heavier now. It had been raining constantly since she arrived in Yuhai, worsening her already gloomy mood. She called You Ruxu, no answer.
You Ruxu never used to ignore her calls. Even if she was in a meeting, she would hang up and immediately message her back, telling her what she was doing. This sudden silence made Zhou Tianzui inexplicably anxious.
Especially after what she had said tonight. Even though she knew You Ruxu wasn’t so fragile, she couldn’t shake the fear.
It couldn’t be.
Zhou Tianzui searched while reassuring herself, then chuckled at her own absurdity. Just a few hours ago, she was the one telling You Ruxu not to come looking for her, and now she was frantically searching, like an ant on a hot pan.
But she was still afraid.
Her self-reassurance didn’t work. Zhou Tianzui, holding an umbrella, searched around the hotel. It was easy to search, as there was no one on the streets, except for the 24-hour convenience store. Everywhere else was dark. After searching twice, not finding anyone, she took a taxi to You Ruxu’s home.
She kept an eye out for any familiar figures on the way.
But she saw nothing.
You Ruxu seemed to have entered a sudden rebellious phase, disappearing without a trace. Wu Xiulian and You Shu, wearing raincoats, were waiting downstairs. Wu Xiulian shook her head when she arrived: “She’s not here.”
“She recently reconnected with that, Han Shuang, right? Her classmate, could she have gone to find her?” Wu Xiulian asked. Wu Xiulian said, “I don’t know, let me get Han Shuang’s contact information.”
When Zhou Tianzui arrived at the You family’s apartment, she saw Wu Xiulian and Wu Xiulian standing downstairs, You Shu still searching nearby. Wu Xiulian, seeing her, was startled and asked, “Any news about Ruxu?”
Zhou Tianzui shook her head.
Wu Xiulian hung up the phone and said, “She didn’t go to Han Shuang’s.”
She then asked Wu Xiulian’s mother, “Sis, what happened to Xu Xu? Why would she suddenly leave home? Did you say something to her?”
Wu Xiulian’s mother said, “I didn’t say anything!”
She glanced at Zhou Tianzui.
Zhou Tianzui’s face was pale and bloodless, her slender frame looking even thinner in the wind.
Wu Xiulian didn’t say anything more.
So, was it because of what she had said?
Zhou Tianzui felt a lump in her throat, unable to speak. Wu Xiulian said, “Could she have gone to a bar nearby?”
Wu Xiulian’s mother said, “Your brother-in-law has already asked someone to check.”
Wu Xiulian rubbed her forehead. After a moment of thought, Wu Xiulian’s mother said, “Tonight—” She looked at Zhou Tianzui, “I told her I threw away her teddy bear.”
“That teddy bear she always brings home?” Even Wu Xiulian knew about it. The first time You Ruxu came back from Jindu, she slept with Wu Xiulian, hugging the teddy bear, asking, “Aunt, isn’t this bear cute?”
Wu Xiulian, looking at the cheap teddy bear that probably cost less than fifty yuan, couldn’t see anything cute about it, shaking her head.
You Ruxu insisted, “It is cute.”
And added, “I like it very much.”
Wu Xiulian teased her, “You like it that much? Then let your aunt hold it.”
You Ruxu refused, “No, you can’t.”
Her tone as serious as if they were discussing a life-altering decision, not a teddy bear. Wu Xiulian frowned, “Why did you throw it away?”
Wu Xiulian’s mother said, “It was torn, so I threw it away.”
“Sis!” Wu Xiulian, with Zhou Tianzui present, didn’t say anything more. Zhou Tianzui asked, “Where did you throw it away?”
Wu Xiulian’s mother was silent.
Wu Xiulian said, “Sis! Maybe that’s why Xu Xu left! Where did you throw it away?”
Wu Xiulian’s mother said, “It’s in my room.”
Wu Xiulian was stunned: “Does Xu Xu know?”
Wu Xiulian’s mother said, “No.”
Zhou Tianzui, hearing this, immediately went to search the nearby trash cans. Wu Xiulian seemed to understand as well and pulled Wu Xiulian’s mother along, searching along the trash cans. Wu Xiulian’s mother said, “No, Ruxu wouldn’t rummage through the trash.”
She couldn’t imagine such a clean and tidy child looking through the garbage.
Wu Xiulian didn’t say anything.
She also couldn’t imagine it. You Ruxu, from the moment she arrived at their home, had always been clean and organized, knowing You Shu had a bit of OCD, always keeping her room tidy, her clothes wrinkle-free, always maintaining a polished and presentable image in public, a habit ingrained since childhood. She would even help tidy up if she saw You Ruxu’s room messy when bringing things upstairs for her.
Such a clean person, now possibly searching through the trash.
The thought made Wu Xiulian’s heart ache.
They searched all the trash cans in the complex, meeting Zhou Tianzui again, but found nothing. Wu Xiulian’s mother, either relieved or trying to comfort herself, said, “Ruxu wouldn’t do that.”
Zhou Tianzui, hearing this, asked, “Is there a garbage disposal station nearby?”
Wu Xiulian’s mother paused.
Wu Xiulian said, “G-garbage disposal station?” She said, “There’s one near the north gate, but it’s a bit far.”
Zhou Tianzui didn’t wait to hear more, rushing out with her umbrella. Wu Xiulian, worried, pulled Wu Xiulian’s mother along. The rain beat heavily against the umbrella. Zhou Tianzui walked quickly, heading straight towards the north gate, searching for the exact location of the garbage disposal station on her phone. She soon saw it in the distance, the streetlights dim and hazy in the heavy rain. She heard Wu Xiulian’s mother insist behind her, “Ruxu wouldn’t come here.”
It was as if fate was deliberately proving her wrong.
Zhou Tianzui looked up and saw someone crouching on the ground, opening trash bags. There were many opened bags around her. You Ruxu hadn’t ripped them open, scattering trash everywhere, but carefully opened them one by one, placing the ones she had searched through to the side. There was already a large pile. She wasn’t using an umbrella, still wearing the same clothes as tonight, her hair drenched, stubbornly searching through one bag after another.
Zhou Tianzui froze.
She stood in front, blocking the view from behind. Wu Xiulian and Wu Xiulian’s mother, approaching, were about to ask what was wrong when they followed her gaze. You Ruxu was crouching there, seemingly isolated from the world, the rain washing over her, surrounded by filth, but she seemed oblivious, just continuing her search, opening each bag, pausing only when she saw something resembling a stuffed toy, placing it aside.
Her lips pressed into a tight line.
A heartbreaking stubbornness.
Zhou Tianzui stood a few meters away, holding her umbrella, her eyes red and blurry with tears.
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