Chapter 45: Game Play
Zhou Tianzui understood her very well. Although she would often jokingly call herself mute, pretending not to understand You Ruxu, You Ruxu knew that Zhou Tianzui understood her perfectly, even her unspoken emotions.
But now, Zhou Tianzui was unresponsive, just standing there, frozen. You Ruxu, catching her breath, called out, “Zhou Tianzui.”
Her voice was clear and bright, like the sound of rain outside, like pearls falling on a jade plate.
Zhou Tianzui stiffened. She stood still, You Ruxu surrounded by her scent and the smell of alcohol. You Ruxu asked, “Are you drunk?”
She turned and looked up, meeting Zhou Tianzui’s gaze.
The light was dim, Zhou Tianzui close, so close that You Ruxu could feel her breath as she spoke, “Do you want me to be drunk?”
What kind of question was that?
You Ruxu didn’t know how to answer for a moment. Zhou Tianzui leaned closer, a cold and indifferent smile playing on her lips, a familiar expression You Ruxu had seen many times before.
But not recently.
Her heart sank, like plunging into ice water, a chilling coldness. You Ruxu wanted to speak, but her tongue felt tied. Zhou Tianzui took two steps back, putting some distance between them. You Ruxu saw several empty beer cans on the coffee table, and an unopened six-pack beside them. She asked Zhou Tianzui, “Why did you drink so much?”
She frowned, “Did something happen at the hospital?”
Zhou Tianzui didn’t speak.
You Ruxu asked again, “Or is it your mom…?”
“Why don’t you ask if something happened to me?” Zhou Tianzui’s tone was cool. She sat on the coffee table and asked You Ruxu, “Can’t anything happen to me?”
You Ruxu pursed her lips.
She realized Zhou Tianzui was looking for a fight.
Like a hedgehog, baring its quills.
She stood there for a few seconds, then sat beside Zhou Tianzui and asked, “Then what happened to you?”
Zhou Tianzui said, “Nothing happened.”
She pushed a beer can towards You Ruxu, gesturing for her to drink. You Ruxu was puzzled, but still took it and took a sip. Zhou Tianzui asked, “What does it taste like?”
You Ruxu tasted a slight bitterness.
She looked at Zhou Tianzui.
Zhou Tianzui, seeing her silence, leaned closer, her body tilting forward, and gently touched You Ruxu’s lips. You Ruxu liked this kind of intimacy with Zhou Tianzui, different from their usual entanglement. This simple touch gave her the illusion that they loved each other, which was why she had enjoyed it so much before.
A sweetness mixed with the taste of alcohol, a unique blend.
To You Ruxu, it was sweet.
With a hint of bitterness.
Zhou Tianzui tasted sourness.
An overwhelming bitterness.
She held You Ruxu tightly in her arms. You Ruxu’s arm hurt from being squeezed, and she frowned, “Zhou Tianzui?”
Zhou Tianzui ignored her, continuing to hold her with an undeniable force. You Ruxu, trapped, turned her head and patted Zhou Tianzui’s shoulder, trying to push her away, but failed.
After a while.
Zhou Tianzui released her.
Asked again, “What does it taste like?”
You Ruxu’s mind was still hazy, she looked at Zhou Tianzui, dazed, this person both familiar and unfamiliar today.
Zhou Tianzui stood up and went to the kitchenette beside the bathroom. The hotel room came with a small kitchen, equipped with only basic utensils and an induction cooker, enough for simple meals like noodles or rice, but not for elaborate dishes.
You Ruxu, unsure what Zhou Tianzui was doing, followed her.
Zhou Tianzui turned on the light, instantly illuminating the living room and the kitchen, making it exceptionally bright. She stood there, cracking an egg, chopping scallions, her movements slow and deliberate. You Ruxu walked over and asked, “What are you doing?”
“Cooking.” Zhou Tianzui didn’t look up, focused on making scallion and egg drop soup. She had made it countless times in the past few years, every step ingrained in her memory, knowing exactly what seasonings to add, and how much, even with her eyes closed.
But in all these years, she had never asked You Ruxu if she liked it.
Zhou Tianzui’s hand paused, a self-deprecating smile appearing on her face. Her back to You Ruxu, her movements became even quicker. You Ruxu stood behind her, unable to interrupt, unable to help. She could only sit at the counter beside the kitchen.
Soon, Zhou Tianzui was done.
She placed the steaming bowl of soup in front of You Ruxu.
The green scallions floated on the surface of the egg drop soup, a pleasing sight. You Ruxu stirred the soup with a spoon, the rising steam obscuring Zhou Tianzui’s expression.
She was still wearing the same clothes, the hem wrinkled, but Zhou Tianzui didn’t seem to care. You Ruxu just glanced at it.
Zhou Tianzui said, “Eat.”
You Ruxu lowered her head, took a spoonful of soup, blew on it, and sipped. It was the familiar taste.
Zhou Tianzui sat beside her and asked casually, “Have you ever thought about changing jobs?”
You Ruxu paused and looked at Zhou Tianzui: “What?”
Zhou Tianzui repeated: “I’m asking if you’re interested in a different job.”
You Ruxu said, “What kind of job?”
Zhou Tianzui said, “An actress.”
She looked at You Ruxu, their eyes meeting. Zhou Tianzui’s gaze was deep and dark, unreadable, “Teacher You, with your acting skills, it’s a waste not to become an actress.”
You Ruxu frowned slightly.
Zhou Tianzui tilted her chin, “How does it taste?”
This was the third time she had asked this question tonight.
You Ruxu asked, “What’s wrong with you?”
“Me?” Zhou Tianzui said, “There’s nothing wrong with me, it’s Teacher You who’s been working hard. I heard you didn’t like cilantro since you were young?”
You Ruxu froze.
She truly didn’t like it.
How did Zhou Tianzui know?
Zhou Tianzui, seeing her dazed expression, asked again, “I’m really curious, what does it feel like to eat something you don’t like? Teacher You, doesn’t it make you nauseous?”
You Ruxu opened her mouth, then closed it without speaking.
Zhou Tianzui said, “It does for me.”
“Eating something I don’t like makes me nauseous. Teacher You must feel the same, right?”
You Ruxu looked at her.
Zhou Tianzui said, “But I don’t have your endurance, being able to endure it for three years. What does it feel like? Forcing yourself to eat scallions even though you hate them, how does it taste?”
“Does it make you feel self-righteous, moved by your own tolerance?”
You Ruxu said, “I don’t…”
“You don’t what? You don’t dislike scallions?” Zhou Tianzui’s expression darkened. She looked at the small bowl in front of You Ruxu, wondering how much she had endured in the past three years.
Eating food she hated.
Or sleeping with someone she loathed?
She wanted to ask her, what did it feel like to kiss her? Disgusting? What did it feel like to sleep with her? Was she also enduring it? She had thought, assumed that between them, at least, it was mutual torture, a consensual game of pain.
So, she had let go of the past, wanting to be a normal couple.
She had never considered, what if You Ruxu didn’t like it?
Zhou Tianzui found her “revenge” of the past few years ridiculous.
Those struggles were ridiculous.
A blatant slap in the face, mocking her own wishful thinking.
You Ruxu said, “I didn’t like it before…”
“But you’re used to it now, so you like it, is that it?” Zhou Tianzui said, “Your kind of ‘like’ is really cheap.”
You Ruxu didn’t understand what she meant. She frowned and called out, “Zhou Tianzui!”
“Just leave.” Zhou Tianzui said, “Don’t come looking for me anymore.”
Those words froze You Ruxu, like a bucket of cold water poured over her head. Her hands were icy. She looked at Zhou Tianzui, “What do you mean?”
She didn’t understand, “But recently you’ve been…”
“What about recently?” Zhou Tianzui chuckled, a cold and emotionless laugh, “Been nicer to you recently? What? Gotten used to it? You Ruxu, I just thought our three-year bed-buddy arrangement was getting boring, I wanted to try something new, that’s all.”
You Ruxu’s body tensed, countless questions suddenly answered, a moment of confusion followed by a soft, murmured, “Try something new?”
Zhou Tianzui said, “Is that a problem? Or does Teacher You find our three-year bed-buddy arrangement not boring enough? Then Teacher You really is…”
You Ruxu finished her sentence: “Pathetic?”
Zhou Tianzui’s jaw tightened, hearing that word. She didn’t say anything more. You Ruxu looked at her for two minutes, then stood up and left the room.
The door slammed shut.
The living room was quiet, only the sound of the relentless rain outside.
Growing heavier and heavier.
After leaving the hotel, You Ruxu got into a taxi and went home, her head resting against the car window, listening to the rain beating against the glass. Her expression was blank, her mind in a daze, Zhou Tianzui’s words echoing in her ears like a curse, binding her, immobilizing her.
“Miss, we’ve arrived.” The driver called out. She snapped back to reality, about to get out without paying, only remembering when the driver called out to her again.
She went upstairs, pressed the elevator button, and reached her door.
The walk wasn’t long, nor was it short.
You Ruxu stood at the door and knocked. Wu Xiulian’s voice came from inside, “Coming.”
She opened the door and exclaimed, “Ruxu, where are your keys?”
Where were her keys?
They were in her hand, she had just forgotten to use them.
Wu Xiulian asked her, “Weren’t you at your aunt’s? Why are your clothes wet?”
Her shoulder was damp from the rain when she got out of the car. You Ruxu said, “I went downstairs to get something.”
Wu Xiulian nodded and said, “Go change your clothes.”
You Ruxu went to her room.
Numbly, she opened the wardrobe door and suddenly felt that something was different. She looked around the room, her gaze settling on the bed. Wu Xiulian, following her gaze, said, “Oh, I tidied up your room tonight, that teddy bear on your bed was torn, so I threw it away. I’ll buy you a new one tomorrow.”
You Ruxu was silent for a few seconds, then said calmly, “Yes, I know.”
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