No. 96 The Courage to Face the Future
After dinner, I volunteered to wash the dishes, slipping into an apron and carrying the dirty dishes to the kitchen.
As I washed, I overheard my father and “brother” discussing my future.
“Girls don’t need to go to prestigious universities. Just find a good husband and settle down,” my father said.
“Dad, I disagree. Yi Yao is a bright student. She should aim for the best universities,” Ziyang protested, his voice earnest. Despite being the newcomer, he had already adopted the role of the protective older brother.
“You’re still young. You don’t understand how the world works. A university degree isn’t worth much these days. She should learn a trade, gain some work experience. Girls don’t have the luxury of time like you boys. Their value depreciates with age.”
I couldn’t understand my father’s logic. He had criticized my poor grades, and now that I was excelling, he was discouraging me from pursuing higher education.
“Surely a degree from Tsinghua or Peking University is still valuable?” Ziyang argued.
“Those universities are too far away. Who will take care of her?”
“She’ll be old enough to take care of herself by then.”
“I’m worried about the tuition fees. Upper Capital City isn’t a wealthy city. One meal at those universities could cost more than our entire daily food budget.”
“Money shouldn’t be an issue.”
“Oh, you make it sound like we’re rich.”
They continued their discussion, their happy banter excluding me, the actual daughter.
I finished washing the dishes, placed them in the sterilizer, removed my apron, washed my hands, and returned to the living room.
“Yi Yao, tell us, which high school do you want to attend?”
My father beckoned me towards the sofa, his expression hopeful. “I’ll listen to you this time.”
“I… Well…”
This time, my hesitation was genuine.
I could get into any high school in the country with my current grades, but I had to consider our financial situation and Xiaodie’s plans.
My family couldn’t know about my involvement with the Black Dragon Society, so even if I had the money, I couldn’t just casually produce a wad of cash and claim to have won the lottery. This charade required authenticity.
“Knock, knock, knock.”
Someone was at the door.
“Coming!”
I hurried towards the door, my slippers slapping against the floor. Before I could even register who it was, a small figure, enveloped in the scent of fresh soap, threw her arms around me.
“Yi Yao-chan, long time no see!”
Xiaodie, her voice cheerful, turned to face the occupants of the living room. “Hello, Uncle, Aunt… Oh, and hello, brother!”
“Hello…”
Ziyang, startled, stammered, “You’re Yi Yao’s friend, Xiaodie, right? I’ve seen your photos online. Have you eaten dinner?”
“Yes, thank you, big brother!”
She giggled, pulling me towards my room. “I’m borrowing Yi Yao for a bit!”
As I was dragged away, I heard Ziyang asking my father about Xiaodie.
“What are you doing here?”
I closed the door, my voice laced with exasperation, watching as Xiaodie sprawled on my bed, her expression a mixture of amusement and mischief.
Her house was a forty-minute bus ride away. This impromptu visit was a waste of her time…
“I came to see the adorable version of Yi Yao-chan.”
She ignored my reproachful tone, sitting up abruptly and scrutinizing me. “Well, you’re doing a good job. You’re very convincing.”
I turned away, my cheeks flushing. “I’m not happy about that.”
Calling a boy “adorable” was just wrong.
“Hmm? Are you still in character? It’s cute. Hee hee, maybe we should reenact that night? I miss your adorable moans!”
“No!”
I panicked. “My dad and Aunt Mo are right outside!”
“That just makes it more exciting, doesn’t it?”
“No! No! No! We can’t do that here…”
“Relax, I’m just kidding.” She pulled me down onto the bed beside her, her voice a mischievous whisper. “Seriously, though, are you confident you can win over your stepbrother? I can help if you need it.”
“I think so.”
Mo Ziyang was just an ordinary geek. I wasn’t unattractive. Gaining his affection wouldn’t be difficult.
“How does it feel? Changing your personality like this? Is it uncomfortable?”
“Not really. It just feels… melancholy.”
I lowered my gaze. “My father seems to like this version of me. And my stepbrother too. They’re both happy when I’m around. But… I…”
I was starting to question the nature of reality.
“Xiaodie, is this happiness… real?”
“If you believe it’s real, then it is,” she replied, turning to face me. “Yi Yao, you know I wasn’t always like this. But I’ve been trying to be a good girlfriend for you. I can be quite selfish.”
“You’re still selfish.”
“Don’t be mean! I’m trying to say that if a little bit of pretense can bring happiness to everyone, then it’s not such a bad thing. When my father was still alive, I had to play a different role. I wore fancy dresses, attended high-society events, spoke eloquently to strangers, and pretended to be a studious, frugal girl at home. It was all to maintain his public image. Isn’t that how the world works?”
She was right.
We were all living a lie, hiding behind masks.
Perhaps I just wasn’t used to pretending to be the daughter my parents wanted.
“Forget about that. Have you thought about which high school we should attend?”
“Isn’t it obvious? No. 1 or No. 5.”
“I don’t recommend those schools.”
“Why not?”
“We’ll lose our youth.”
“But everyone wants to go to those schools. They’re the best in the city.”
“The only reason to attend those schools is to increase our chances of getting into a good university. But if we’re guaranteed a place at a top university, regardless of which high school we attend, then it doesn’t matter, does it?”
“Are you saying you can guarantee us a place at a top university?”
“I can guarantee myself a place… As for you…” I chuckled, my gaze lingering on her. “I’m confident I can teach even a dummy like you to pass the entrance exams.”
“You!”
She punched me playfully in the chest. “Fine, you win. You decide which high school we go to.”
I raised my hands in surrender. “Okay, okay. Personally, I prefer No. 36 Middle School.”
No. 36, like No. 33, was a model high school in Upper Capital City, but it was the lowest-ranked among them.
I had chosen this school because of its reputation for extracurricular activities.
Anime conventions, art festivals, club activities, school festivals… they had it all.
No. 36 was the first school in Yixian Province to relax its rules regarding student behavior and appearance. Students were allowed to bring snacks to class, to use their phones and laptops, to order takeout instead of eating in the cafeteria. As long as it didn’t disrupt the learning environment, anything was permitted.
And most importantly, their uniforms were inspired by Japanese school uniforms, a stark contrast to the drab, standardized uniforms mandated by the city’s education bureau. The girls wore sailor uniforms and skirts, and there were no restrictions on hairstyles, as long as they weren’t dyed in outrageous colors or styled in a way that resembled the “funeral love family.”
And conveniently, No. 36 was relatively close to our apartment, making it easier to convince my father.
“No. 36? That… I…”
Xiaodie’s eyes widened. “My friend’s father is the principal there.”
“Seriously? Your friend is that well-connected?”
“I met her through the Jiangnan Association. If we go to that school, we could probably get in even with zero points on the entrance exams…”
Just then, someone knocked on the door.
“Yi Yao?”
My father’s voice. “Your brother is leaving. Aren’t you going to say goodbye?”
“Coming!”
I opened the door, catching Ziyang just as he was about to leave.
“Brother Mo!”
I rushed towards him, my cheeks flushed, and handed him my phone, its settings preconfigured. “C-can I have your QQ number?”
He blinked, surprised, then his face lit up. He typed his number into my phone.
“Here you go.”
“Thank you, brother!”
I bowed, my voice a shy whisper. “Have a safe trip home!”
Then, like a lovestruck schoolgirl, I turned and fled back to my room.
“Hahaha! Yi Yao, you’re hilarious! If I didn’t know you, I would have fallen for that act,” Xiaodie said, pulling out her phone. “Come on, let’s take a picture for Weibo. I want to show everyone your adorable side.”
I reluctantly posed for the photo, flashing a peace sign.
“What are you going to do with his QQ number?”
“Mischief.”
“Huh?”
“Just watch,” I said, settling down at my computer. “Tonight will be a night he’ll never forget.”
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