No. 36 The Loneliness Behind Glory
On Monday morning, after the morning exercises, I was summoned to the homeroom teacher’s office.
“Yi Yao, after careful consideration, the school administration has decided to give you a chance to retake the history exam.”
The homeroom teacher’s gaze was evasive, mirroring the expressions of the other teachers in the room. A strange chill settled over me.
Their voices were gentle, their words comforting, as if they were walking on eggshells around me.
They had never treated me like this before.
It was as if they had discovered a hidden treasure, a gold mine beneath the feet of a lowly insect.
I would rather they looked at me with fear and resentment than this sudden shift in attitude.
It could only mean one thing: I had become valuable in their eyes.
What was the measure of a student’s worth?
Grades.
Academic performance.
It had been three days since the history exam. The diligent teachers had ample time to grade all the papers and compile the results.
If my scores were still as abysmal as before, they would have simply tossed me a new history test paper and said, “Redo it,” pressured by public opinion. They wouldn’t have summoned me for a formal meeting.
But… I’m sorry, I might be “Yi Yao”, but I’m also the other “Yi Yao”.
I couldn’t compromise, not after all the pain and humiliation Yi Yao had endured because of them.
“No, thank you.”
I smiled faintly, shaking my head, as the cold air from the air conditioner blew against my face. “It’s against school rules. I missed the exam, and I accept the consequences. The school shouldn’t make exceptions for students like me.”
And what about that 5,000-word essay you assigned me?
“Don’t be like that…”
The homeroom teacher chuckled nervously. “Yi Yao, perhaps I haven’t been the most attentive teacher, but people change, right? Just like you, hiding your true abilities all this time. How could I have known you were so talented?”
She was essentially saying that they were only being nice to me because I possessed something they valued: “talent.”
“This has nothing to do with your lack of attention, teacher.” I maintained my calm demeanor. “Thank you for your concern, but I’ll accept the failing grade for that subject. If there’s nothing else, I’ll be going now.”
“You…” Her face darkened, but it quickly brightened again, as if she had remembered something. “Fine, if you insist. But I hope you’ll continue to strive for excellence in your future exams, okay?”
She finally understood. It wasn’t about the actual score, but the ranking.
Whether I scored a perfect 750 or a 650, as long as I was first in the grade, it didn’t affect her bonus.
“Okay.”
I bowed politely and left the office.
As I walked away, I could hear their excited chatter behind me, marveling at how “No. 3 Middle School finally has another genius” and how I could “still get first place even after missing an exam.”
Yi Yao… can you see this? I’ve fulfilled your dream, using your own hands.
This homeroom teacher had just transferred to No. 3 Middle School a few months ago. In just one month, Yi Yao had been subjected to countless criticisms and humiliations because of her grades. So, influenced by her memories, I had a strong dislike for this teacher.
Perhaps out of weakness, Yi Yao had endured the teacher’s unfair treatment in silence.
Like most students, she had fantasized about getting first place in the grade and showing this opportunistic woman what she was truly capable of.
Now, I had fulfilled that fantasy, albeit unintentionally.
As I returned to the classroom, I saw Tan Lijiang and Liang Tong arguing with two boys from Class 12 at the doorway. It looked like a fight was about to break out.
“What’s going on?”
I walked over to Tan Lijiang, my hands tucked in my pockets.
“Nothing much. Just some arrogant jerks from Class 12.”
Tan Lijiang looked agitated.
“Arrogant jerks?”
One of the Class 12 boys laughed. “Isn’t your class the worst in the grade? Both academically and athletically. Am I wrong? If you can’t handle the truth, don’t come to school.”
Liang Tong sneered. “The exam results aren’t even out yet. Aren’t you being a bit too confident?”
“You think everyone is as clueless as you? We have connections in the school. We already know the results. I’ll give you a hint: your class is at the bottom.”
Tan Lijiang, enraged, took a step forward, but I held him back.
“You’re still the same. Getting angry over the smallest things.”
I walked past them, patting their shoulders. “Perhaps when you grow up, you’ll realize that the things you care about now are insignificant.”
“But he…” Tan Lijiang pointed at the two boys. “They’re insulting our class! Can you tolerate that?”
“Those who spread rumors are either malicious or bored. There’s no point in engaging with them.”
“Oh? Who do we have here? It’s the mistress, Yi Yao, the girl who’s being kept by a boy from another school.”
One of the Class 12 boys, unable to contain his anger, stepped forward. “I remember your grades consistently ranking in the bottom ten. And you even missed an exam this time. What gives you the right to talk down to us?”
The bell rang, its sound faint against the wind.
“Liang Jingru gave me the courage.”
I gave them a cryptic look, then turned and entered the classroom. “Let’s go.”
“Oh.”
Tan Lijiang and Liang Tong snapped out of their daze and followed me.
“Haha, scared now that you know your results?”
The two boys continued their taunts, but I ignored them and sat down at my desk.
“Yi Yao, how did you do on the exams?”
“Around 630, I guess.”
“Thud!”
Tan Lijiang, who was walking towards his desk, stumbled and fell, his jaw dropping. He scrambled to his feet, his voice trembling. “Are you kidding me?”
“No.”
I took a sip of my salted water. “Let me rephrase that… I bombed the exams. Only 650 points. I’m so ashamed.”
“Please, just stick to your original statement. My heart can’t take it.”
Just then, the Chinese teacher entered the classroom, his arms laden with test papers. “What are you doing over there? Get back to your seats.”
“It seems everyone struggled with this exam.”
Our first class was Chinese, my favorite subject. Unlike other subjects, where memorizing the answers guaranteed a high score, the essay component in Chinese was a wild card.
“I’ll give you a brief overview of the results.”
Our Chinese teacher was a middle-aged man with a weary face and a soothing voice. Half the class usually dozed off during his lectures, but he was a kind teacher, rarely getting angry over trivial matters like missing homework. As a result, our class’s Chinese scores were actually decent.
“This time, we used the mid-term exam papers from Nurturing Talent Middle School. Heh, I’m sure you all experienced the difficulty firsthand. The average score for our grade is 81. Our class average is 88.5. Which means we have the highest average score for Chinese in the entire grade.”
His words were met with gasps of disbelief.
“Teacher…”
Tan Lijiang raised his hand, his voice trembling. “Are you sure it’s our class? Class 11?”
“Yes, isn’t this Class 11?”
The teacher adjusted his glasses. “Did I enter the wrong classroom? Tan Lijiang, you’re in Class 11, right? I remember you.”
“But… that’s impossible.”
“Yeah, if we can get the highest average score, what about the top two classes?”
“Didn’t they say we were the worst class?”
Seeing that the class was about to descend into chaos again, the teacher raised his hand for silence. “Are you questioning my memory? Class 1’s average score is 87.5, Class 2’s is 88. Your class has the highest average.”
“Then…”
“Can you please let me finish?”
He cut off the student impatiently, picked up a test paper, and peered at the name through his reading glasses. “Yi… Yi Yao? Who’s Yi Yao? Is there a student named Yi Yao in our class?”
Over fifty pairs of eyes turned towards me.
I stood up. “It’s me.”
“Oh… you’re Yi Yao. I don’t recall seeing you before. Do you know what you scored on this exam?”
I shook my head.
“Before I reveal your score, let me explain the difficulty of this exam. According to Nurturing Talent Middle School’s statistics, their average score is 93. The highest score is 139, achieved by a girl in their top class.”
“As you all know, “Nurturing Talent” is a prestigious school. Getting in there practically guarantees you a spot in a top high school. And even their best student only scored 139. But!”
He paused for dramatic effect. “But in our school, in our class, Yi Yao scored a perfect 150!”
The entire class, including me, was stunned.
Wait… this wasn’t what I expected… How could there be a perfect score in Chinese?
I was still in shock when he held up my test paper, covered in red check marks.
“Perfect score on multiple choice and fill-in-the-blanks. Perfect score on reading comprehension. Perfect score on the essay. A total of 150 points! Yi Yao, come up and collect your paper. You’re the pride of Class 11.”
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