Chapter 14: Like It Was the First Time
Chu Jingyi’s favorite animal was the teddy bear, with both “small” and “bear” crucial components. She loved the teddy bear’s clumsy and endearingly simple appearance. She couldn’t explain why, but she felt like she could see a reflection of herself in them. She used to be like a bear, “domineering” in elementary school. Back then, people would call her father every day to complain, saying, “Your daughter is bullying my son at school,” or “My daughter has been crying non-stop since she came home.” Little Chu Jingyi would listen from the side and retort angrily, “That’s not true! They were copying each other’s homework! I made them stand in the corner as punishment according to the class rules!”
Her father would always respond politely to the person on the phone, never using his status or power to pressure them. Afterwards, he would smile and rub Little Chu Jingyi’s head. “Yi Bao, rules are meant to be broken. Sometimes, you have to learn to be considerate of others. That’s how rules become truly meaningful.”
“But they were copying homework!”
“Then you don’t have to make them stand in the corner.” Her father pinched her cheek gently. “You can criticize them privately, but you can’t humiliate them in front of the entire class. That kind of shame will stay with them for the rest of their lives.”
Chu Jingyi didn’t understand the deeper meaning of her father’s words until she met Lu Li.
She walked to the doorway and watered the two potted plants, her mind filled with thoughts of Lu Li. She was glad that he was a magnanimous person and didn’t hold her mistakes against her. If… if Lu Li had really become distant, she would feel like a part of her was missing, as if she had permanently missed out on something in life.
But what was their relationship now?
Chu Jingyi wasn’t stupid. She had thought about the relationship between her, Lu Li, and An Baili more than once. She felt like she was the third wheel intruding on their relationship. This thought had made her want to run away more than once, but with An Baili’s encouragement, she chose to follow her heart, the passionate love that made her lose sleep and appetite.
The green plants drank the clear dew drops, and she heard her mother chatting with An Baili.
Baili is such a lovely girl. She thought. Her mother, Lu Li, and even herself, they all instinctively doted on her. She was different, always impulsive and aggressive. No wonder Lu Li liked Baili first…
Chu Jingyi put down the watering can and squatted by the doorway, lost in thought.
The girl’s worries drifted with the early spring breeze, a mixture of cherry blossom fragrance and the bittersweet scent of youth. For the first time, she felt uncertain about the future, for the first time she lacked confidence in herself. She felt like the hopeful and ambitious Chu Jingyi from before had died, lost in her love for Lu Li.
“It’s rare to see you so down.”
The girl looked up and saw Lu Li walking towards her, bathed in the warm spring sunlight. She wanted to call out to him, but he placed his hand on her head. “Shh, let’s surprise Baili. Silly Goose, why are you squatting here alone? What’s troubling you?”
“Well…” Chu Jingyi was a straightforward girl, she rarely kept her feelings bottled up. “Lu Li, I’m thinking, what are we going to do in the future?”
“What future?”
“After we graduate from high school. You… you’ll definitely be with another girl, right? If that happens, what about me, or Baili?” Chu Jingyi’s squatting posture was far from graceful, like a village girl waiting for her dog to come home. She must have a lot on her mind. The purer a person was, the more likely they were to accumulate negative emotions. Although their tolerance for negative emotions was high, one day, they would explode like a balloon under pressure.
Lu Li felt a pang of guilt. He put down his backpack and sat next to Silly Goose, inhaling her scent. Was it the smell of her shampoo? It didn’t matter…
“If, I mean if, you and Baili get together, I’ll definitely be heartbroken.” The silly girl stared blankly ahead. “Very, very heartbroken. But if you don’t end up with Baili, I’ll feel sorry for her, she likes you so much… Lu Li, I’m so conflicted. It feels like our future is a tragedy no matter what.”
“Then let’s just stay together, the three of us.” Lu Li said shamelessly.
“That’s not possible!”
“Why not?” Lu Li retorted. “Since any one of us leaving would hurt the other two, wouldn’t it be better for us to stay together like this, happy and carefree?”
“But, but, only two people can get married.” Chu Jingyi was taken aback by Lu Li’s idea.
“Yi Bao, will you marry me?”
Silly Goose’s face turned crimson, first her cheeks, then her small ears, a delicate, tender pink. In that brief moment, Silly Goose imagined the next few decades of her life. She imagined herself putting on an apron and cooking for him, being pregnant for ten months and telling stories to the baby in her belly, and growing old with him, holding hands and basking in the sun in the courtyard.
“I… I don’t know.” Her voice was barely a whisper.
Lu Li smiled and said, “Rules are meant to be broken.”
There it was again. Those words again. Just like her father, Silly Goose still didn’t understand the deeper meaning.
Lu Li patted the silly girl’s head and entered the house. Mrs. Chu had gone upstairs for her afternoon nap. Only An Baili was nestled on the soft sofa, watching TV. You From The Sun Season 2. Was it already on its second season?
The moment he saw An Baili, Lu Li felt all the pressure lift from his shoulders. Even after smashing the pendant, he was still worried about the price An Baili had to pay. He had asked himself countless “what ifs.” What if Baili’s price didn’t disappear? What if she never woke up? What if, what if, what if… Thank heavens, those “what ifs” remained just “what ifs.”
“Baili, I’m back.”
His soft words made An Baili jump up from the sofa. Her eyes were filled with tears as she threw herself into his arms. “I missed you so much!” Lu Li quickly hugged her tightly, afraid that she would fall.
“We’ve only been apart for two days, did you miss me that much?” Lu Li teased half-jokingly.
“But, but it felt like forever…” An Baili sobbed in his arms. “I really, really, really missed you. I can’t be apart from you for even a second, I’ll die…”
“Silly girl, are you still coughing and feeling sleepy?”
“…It seems to be gone today…” Speaking of which, An Baili realized the change in herself. Her eyes widened in surprise. “Am I cured?”
“Well, look who your husband is.”
“I want a kiss from hubby~” An Baili rubbed against Lu Li’s chin, her sweetness not like that of a long-married couple, but more like newlyweds on their honeymoon.
“Kisses are for next time.” Lu Li gently stroked An Baili’s black hair. “Let’s go somewhere fun.”
“Where?”
Lu Li took out the aquarium tickets. He bought them on his way back. After all these years, the Chuanhai Aquarium finally had real white dolphins.
“To see the dolphins.” Lu Li swung An Baili onto his back and walked towards the door as the girl squealed in surprise, just like when he carried Little An Baili to the aquarium years ago.
“I haven’t put on my shoes yet, how can I go out barefoot~” An Baili protested weakly, then乖乖地rested her head on his back. No matter how many times she experienced it, she always felt safe and secure in Lu Li’s arms.
Just then, Chu Jingyi, after finishing watering the plants, saw Lu Li carrying An Baili. She instinctively stepped aside to make way for them. To her surprise, Lu Li reached out and grabbed her arm. “Jingyi, come with us, I bought three tickets.”
“Huh?… Oh…” Silly Goose let Lu Li lead her away. She looked at An Baili, who smiled at her.
Chu Jingyi’s heart skipped a beat. A thought crossed her mind: It seems quite nice… the three of us together like this.
And so, Chu Jingyi’s peaceful holiday came to a quiet end…
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