Chapter 38: Even If It’s a Lie, I’m Willing to Wait for You
Silence hung heavy in the air inside the cave.
Chen Yin and Shen Shuanglian sat facing the fire, both with their heads lowered, neither speaking a word.
The flickering flames cast dancing shadows on Shen Shuanglian’s face, her cheeks flushed the same color as the fire. Her lips were tightly pressed together, and the faint sound of her heartbeat filled the silence.
“Ahem… Well, Senior Sister,” Chen Yin finally broke the awkward silence, speaking in a serious tone.
“Here’s the thing. It is what it is. Whether you want to kill me or punish me, it’s all up to you. I won’t complain.”
“But I think we should focus on dealing with the current situation first. You can punish me later.”
Shen Shuanglian didn’t answer. She just kept her head lowered, almost burying her face in her knees.
Chen Yin cautiously observed her and asked tentatively, “Uh, is there any other way to… cure this poison from the demon core?”
“…Normally, you could just expel the chaotic spiritual energy from the demon core, and it would be fine.”
After a long silence, Shen Shuanglian finally dared to raise her head slightly, revealing her trembling eyes. Her voice was soft and weak. “But… my meridians are damaged, and I can’t use my spiritual energy…”
“I-I don’t know if there’s any other way…”
Seeing the tears welling up in Shen Shuanglian’s eyes, Chen Yin panicked and stammered, “Senior Sister, please don’t cry! I-I didn’t do it on purpose.”
“I didn’t know that the Purple-Whiskered Thunder Mane Tiger was special! I thought all demon cores could be used for healing.”
He slapped himself hard twice. “It’s my fault, it’s my fault for being lazy when I was studying. I didn’t remember any of the spirit beast illustrations Master told me to read. I deserve to die, I’m so sorry, Senior Sister—”
Before he could slap himself again, a soft hand gently grasped his wrist.
Shen Shuanglian’s face was flushed, and she said softly, “Stop it… Stop pretending. You’re enjoying this, aren’t you?”
Chen Yin chuckled sheepishly and stopped. “So, Senior Sister isn’t angry with me anymore?”
“I-I wasn’t angry with you in the first place.”
Shen Shuanglian hugged her knees, her usual cold and aloof demeanor replaced by the shyness of a young girl with a fluttering heart. “I was just… a little scared.”
“Scared? Scared that the poison would hurt you?”
Shen Shuanglian bit her lip hard and didn’t answer.
Chen Yin coughed deliberately and sat up straight. “I, Chen Yin, might be cowardly and lecherous, but I’m also a man who takes responsibility for his actions.”
“Since I’m the one who caused you to be poisoned, I will take full responsibility. I won’t let your innocence be tarnished by me.”
“Just tell me, Senior Sister, what can cure this poison? I’ll go through fire and water to get it for you.”
Shen Shuanglian didn’t speak, just glanced at him timidly.
“What if… there’s no other way?”
“…”
Chen Yin scratched his head and looked at Shen Shuanglian with a pitiful expression. “Th-then what should we do? We can’t just… ?”
As if burned by his intense gaze, Shen Shuanglian quickly looked away and buried her head again.
Chen Yin could only stare at her awkwardly.
The fire crackled softly, and the cave fell silent, so quiet that you could hear a pin drop.
Time seemed to slow down. Neither of them dared to speak, only stealing glances at each other in the flickering firelight.
The flames cast a soft pink glow on Shen Shuanglian’s skin, making her look incredibly shy.
Shen Shuanglian remained silent, and Chen Yin finally sighed.
…Honestly, he hadn’t expected things to turn out this way.
He had a good impression of this beautiful, charming, and outwardly cold but inwardly warm Senior Sister. But he wouldn’t have deliberately orchestrated this situation just for that.
He had genuinely wanted to find something to help her recover from her injuries, but who knew it would lead to this?
For the first time, he regretted not paying more attention to the books his Master had given him to read. If he had studied them more carefully, he might not be in such an awkward situation now.
What Chen Yin feared the most was whether Senior Sister could accept that kind of treatment.
It might not be a big deal to him, but for a conservative and reserved woman like Senior Sister, she might rather die than lose her innocence. Should he just watch as her condition worsened, or should he force himself on her to save her life?
Just the thought of it filled Chen Yin with guilt.
As he was frowning and worrying, a barely audible voice came from beside him:
“Will you… keep your promise?”
“What promise?”
“Take full responsibility for me.” Shen Shuanglian slowly raised her timid eyes to meet his.
Chen Yin fell silent, then bowed deeply towards her.
“If Senior Sister doesn’t mind, then I, Chen Yin, vow to be with you for life, never abandoning you, until death do us part.”
He spoke earnestly, each word clear and resolute.
Shen Shuanglian’s eyes widened slightly, then she quickly lowered them, hiding the sweetness in her gaze.
“…Okay.”
“So, what does Senior Sister mean?” Chen Yin asked cautiously.
Shen Shuanglian didn’t answer directly. Instead, she said softly, “Just talk to me for a while.”
She glanced at the space beside her, as if inviting him to sit closer.
Chen Yin immediately scooted over and sat beside her.
“What does Senior Sister want to talk about?”
“You…” She blushed, hesitating for a long time before finally mustering the courage to ask softly, “Do you have any experience?”
Chen Yin froze, then blushed as well, chuckling awkwardly.
…Experience? What experience?
He had been single his entire life. In his previous life, the most intimate interaction he had with a girl was playing house with his neighbor’s little sister when he was a child.
Although in this life, he had somehow managed to have ambiguous encounters with two women, even kissing was enough to make his heart race. Anything beyond that was simply beyond his courage.
“I heard… it’s very painful…”
“Uh, probably. I can be gentle?”
Shen Shuanglian glared at him playfully.
Chen Yin looked at her innocently, unsure what he had said wrong.
…Could it be that Senior Sister preferred it rough?
He suddenly noticed that Shen Shuanglian’s body seemed to be slightly warm, and her breathing had become a little erratic. Her collar was pulled open slightly.
Uh, was the poison already taking effect?
Chen Yin didn’t dare to ask. As long as Shen Shuanglian didn’t say anything, he could only watch helplessly.
Shen Shuanglian seemed to notice her own discomfort. She bit her lip, her eyes sparkling, and said softly:
“I have one more question for you.”
“What is it?”
“Do you… like me?”
Chen Yin took a deep breath. “Do you want to hear the truth, Senior Sister?”
Shen Shuanglian nodded.
“Before I answer, can Senior Sister answer a question for me first?”
“What do you think of me?” Chen Yin asked seriously.
Shen Shuanglian thought for a moment and replied softly, “An unreliable and lecherous Junior Brother.”
“…Nothing else?”
“No.”
Chen Yin facepalmed and said, “In that case, are you really willing to give yourself to me?”
“To the unreliable and lecherous Junior Brother you described?”
Shen Shuanglian was speechless for a moment. She was about to speak but stopped herself.
Her eyelashes lowered, and a hint of sadness appeared in her eyes.
“If you’re truly unwilling, Senior Sister, there’s no need to force yourself. This is my fault. I’ll make sure you’re safe, even if it costs me my life.”
Chen Yin looked at her intently. “I hope you won’t regret your decision one day.”
Shen Shuanglian pressed her lips together.
She remained silent for a long time before finally saying:
“Put out the fire.”
Chen Yin obeyed and waved his sleeve. The fire instantly extinguished.
The cave was plunged back into darkness. In the faint light filtering in from outside, Chen Yin saw Shen Shuanglian’s bright eyes, shimmering in the darkness.
After a moment of rustling sounds, Chen Yin heard a soft voice:
“…You still haven’t answered. Do you like me?”
“I’m afraid that if I tell you, you’ll think I’m a frivolous man and regret it.”
“Aren’t you?”
“At least I keep my promises.” Chen Yin shrugged.
Then, he suddenly felt a soft and warm body press against his back, her arms wrapping around him from behind.
“Actually, it doesn’t matter if you like me or not.”
“Maybe I just wanted to hear you say it once. Even if it’s a lie.” She whispered in his ear.
“Even if it’s a lie, I’m willing to wait for you.”
“…Even if I never get to see you again.”
“Chen Yin.”
Chen Yin’s pupils constricted.
It had been a long time since he had heard anyone call him by that name.
…It was his name from his previous life.
He was about to speak, but his lips were already sealed by a soft touch.
It was a gentle and clear sensation, like moonlight melting away the ice.
Everything melted away.
Only soft moans echoed faintly in the cave.
“…You’re hurting me.”
“…I’m sorry.”
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